Some people think that I hate masculine guys and I am here to tell you that is not trrrrueee. I do however have enormous problems with the concept of “natural” masculinity and the hierarchy of gender expressions among gay men. It is a very politically correct story.

In the gay community of Stockholm, it is very simple. By adding traditional masculine attributes to your look, you will increase your chances of getting laid. It is pathetic but effective, and I see why people are doing that. But some people think that is is enough to butch up your online profile by using terms like “straight acting”, “boy next door” or “not into queens” and at the same time be a total queen in real life. I do adore queens. But butching up online to get laid is just silly.

Stockholm Central Station, rush hour. I recognized him from qruiser, 30-something, cute, great body. I remember his profile just because he was cute and the profile was over the top… butch. He stated that he thought that queens gave normal gay men like him a bad repuatation, that he did not like femme asians and that he was a bottom, but very, very masculine. I am standing there, recollecting his profile when I see what is wrong with the picture. It is his gym bag, his Abercombie & Fitch gym bag. Well, not much the bag as how he carried it, over his elbow with his limb hand pointing at his own shoulder, like he was a 20-something blogger showing off her first oversized Hermés Birkin. Let me tell you, that is not a masculine way of carrying a gym bag.